.Thursday, March 01, 2007 ' 7:18 PM Y
=x
Mood: ...ehh...
misunderstood. i think.
yesterday i was training. and not with my team.
the basketball team.
I don't know what this means. I mean..am i really going back to this?
..i dunnoo...
been talking to certain ppl..
mum of cuz, disapproves .quite annoying. she's not at all supportive of me.
I wonder why?
mm. not making the right decisions lately..with all the work, bball and HIJACK.., i haven't had enough time to think..even to write...
...sigh. my basketball skills...and my fitness...
my studies..
there's no balance. it's hard.
...just that today, really copped it off...
Mr Lim kept announcing 'the captain', 'the captain' which really set me off...
I don't know if that's a signal for me not to join back.
..i just..don't want to disappoint teacher again. but there's so many things.
..wee was right. crap. as usual. can;'t stand it. even when he's barely involved in my life, he's freakin right. can't stand that.
so now i have, problems. grr. quit means quit, huh?
and then he says 'i always knew u'd join back'.
tired. so tired. and so much anger from the past...
I thought with a new goal, to be the no.1 in s'pore, that goal would set me free...give me a bit of freedom...and a bit of discipline.
but even my muscles are still aching from yesterday;s workout...so outta shape...
...I don't know what to do.
Please God, help me decide what to do.
Mm. no social life.
so..tomorrow's the cross country. the bball team's not taking part...but there's the thailand guy, and Jed.
mm. and on sat im not sure whether mum's gonna let me off for the training...
strictly individual training and physical, apparentely.
I'm scared. Of my future. of who I am. of who im becoming.
I need a lot of time now.
ShadowFighterX