.Monday, July 30, 2007 ' 10:57 PM Y
=x
Mood: Ugh.
Pearl u haven't changed my blogskin yet...
ahhh...so emo...
hate myself for feeling this way. it's so stupid, so silly, so dominating, childish, impractical. so luke-like. hate that.
i mean, do i have to do this all the time!? where the heck is some sort of self control i once had?!
and i why the heck isn't my sp recovering fast enough?!
okay that has nothing to do with my situation.
oh god, i hate myself for doing this to her. im such an asshole. argh!
i will never, EVER, do this again.
not to her. not to anyone i care about. i do not get to be domineering.
i wish someone could punch me in the face and tell me to shut up because im really killing myself internally.
but i guess on sat, everything will be back to normal. god, i [pray it'll be normal. because in the end, all i can live with is her friendship, and i can't lose that.
..why does this feel familiar?
god, if you don't kill me, please make things better.