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.Tuesday, January 15, 2008 ' 10:06 PM Y
=x

Mood: Drifting...

Touch.
Pearl accelerates! AHAHA.

okay nevermind. speaking of pearl, and everyone else..I haven't had time to write at all except in school during recess and chem classes...

my bball's busted. what a bummer. =(
I posted ShadowFighterX up, but it's generated almost no sucess. I really need to post ShadowRealm and edit ShadowFighterX before I post it up, otherwise it will be a no-link trilogy.

today was rather interesting.
firstly, I found out why people (i don't need examples here, do i?) were freaked out by me, and it was because of my sudden mysterious rematerialization.
or basically, the art of stalking, aka wee lin.
as in, that's why she probably thinks it is, and not what im saying it is.

I have decided to claim...ABSOUTELY NO RESPONSIBILITY for it. WTH la. If people aren't observant at ALL, can you honestly blame me if I popped out of thin air?!

take today for example. I was standing outside the canteen sipping water I had just refilled when poof, out comes adrienne! so I was like *waves and gives random smirk* and she was like *ignores and walks away* and so I was like "huh?" and of course, my smirk died. It's no fun smirking at someone who you know isn't happy about your appearance if they don't notice you at the first point.

just kidding.

well, I had enough messing around. Sure, it was fun arguing and all, but I guess I should be serious about some things in my life at least...this being one of them. I would prefer closure to the constant bickering...though sometimes. I do wonder. If the circumstances were different, would the outcome have changed also?

welll...
so anyway I appeared and practiced my hundred-watt smile on Adrienne, to which she promptly flinched. I think 'sneaky little bastard' is my new nickname from her. so after promptly shocking her, I sort of realized eventually that I did that for the most of them as well.

i'd like to think it's not my fault they were so unobservant, but I guess I do know how to make myself invisible sometimes. so I can't blame them anymore. sigh. sad. doesn't just about anyone hate admitting they're wrong?

talked to liqing today. originally, I had it all planned out: blackmail adrienne with a bunch of recordings and force her into a situation where liqing HAS to talk to me, in order to get closure from wee lin. however, since weelin has clearly had closure, I suppose it all became irrelevant. me? well. this just about ALWAYS happens, doesn't it? it's like. if someone was to watch the november/december of every year, they'd think I enjoy holiday flings or something.

so blackmailing adrienne was out of it. I thought that I would be a COMPLETE asshole and go through with it, but it turns out im not. I mean, since weelin's not suffering,why should they? or me. oro. so i deleted them today.

yeah adrienne. i did. not just to prove im not a complete scumbag, but I did it for me. I was starting to lose myself in this whole business. nobody deserves what I would have done to you or liqing, and it would have hurt me also.

liqing was pretty smart. she anticipated that i wouldn't be making a record of the phone conversation and even worse, actually proved me wrong on some level. I hate to admit that that's pretty impressive from a sec 2 girl who looks like half my height.

originally, I thought the phone call went well, because it was actually pretty funny. liqing was laughing half the time, though until now I still can't tell whether she was just being cynical. at least she has a sense of humour, even though she does speak rather loudly. plus, she made me swallow my pride thrice and didn't hear a single word I said. errgh.

I've been pretty mean to them these past few days, I admit. Nothing like the way I treated weelin when it looked like we might get together. Guess my heart finally accepted it. and just kind of snapped then. it's something I'll never get used to.

I wonder what I'm going to do tomorrow? Or for the rest of this year?
Not messing around with those girls, that's for sure. but I will miss that. even though the last time I said this it freaked liqing's whole gang out, I just said it because I meant it. maybe that's the problem with being me...I try being myself even with complete strangers. guess I am weird. but no one's normal, so it's a consolation.

I don't think my crazy neighbour will ever read this, but she should know that she won. Although I told her already, she probably didn't acknowledge it the first time. She did what she did not just for herself but for her friends, and even though it was a little cruel I guess I might have done the same in her position. so she has a little bit of my respect, although she probably doesn't want it! ahaha...

ah well.
so another vaguely interesting part of my life goes by. I can go back to being myself..and maybe find someone else to fall in love with after ward.

haiz..hope pearl finds her stuff.

hmm. perhaps after all this..
oh ya. tom and waik. u guys need to tell me whether u can make it on friday. just remember it's free pool, bball, comfy bungalow and ping pong and stuff. you'll love it, trust me. mm. I havent been up there for a while myself! hehe.

which means I'll be away for the weekend.
ciao, people.

I'm sleepy.

ShadowFighterX

oh ya mingrui. no offense, but I dont like raymond. he just pisses me off. maybe one day I'll tell him. he can shove his 'famous for emoing' up his ass.







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